Rocktails

Okay, it's time for some levity at the end of an awful week.

Allow me (as if you could forbid me) to introduce Rocktails.

It's something I've posted on various sites before and I freely admit that I stole the idea completely from NME. Way back in the early 90s, they published a throwaway article of cocktail recipes based on rock stars. One of these days I'll dig out the original article and post it, but today isn't that day. I've taken the idea and devised a few of my own. Some will be a bit dated now, but hopefully still good for a laugh. Suggestions or challenges welcome.

Warning!
These are not real recipes! This is for entertainment purposes only. I take no responsibility for anything that happens to anyone who is silly enough to actually mix and consume any of these concoctions. This disclaimer applies to all future posts with the Rocktails label.


The Paul & Heather

Mix 2 parts 25yo single malt scotch whiskey with 1 part Island Cooler in a stainless steel Gucci blender.
Taste.
Mix again.
Taste
Leak recipe to the press.
Add twist of lemon.
Taste.
Continue adding twists of lemon until the whole thing is so bitter you pour it out.


The U2

Combine Irish whiskey with lime juice and soda water in a straight glass and mix earnestly.
Garnish with novelty hats.
Pour out of the straight glass into a modern design glass.
Add lemon.
Pour into a really silly glass with flashing lights.
When the straight glass has come back into fashion, pour it back into that and serve on an oversized coaster with the contact numbers for Greenpeace, Amnesty International and Make Poverty History.