08 December, 2018

The problem with Rudolph

Never mind Baby It’s Cold Outside or Fairytale of New York. If you want to talk about bad messages in Christmas songs, try Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.

You see, Rudolph was born different. To wit: he had a very shiny nose. For this, all of the other reindeer used to laugh and call him names. Furthermore, they excluded him from their reindeer games.

However, Santa sees the value in Rudolph's uniqueness and gives him a special job to which he is especially suited. And then how the reindeer loved him!

Now you might think Santa is being pretty cool promoting Rudolph to the most popular reindeer and making the other reindeer accept him, but that’s not really what happens. He could have stopped the rest of the team teasing him any time he wanted, but he didn’t until he had a use for Rudolph.

And did the reindeer really love him? I doubt it. They were never shown the error of their ways. They only accepted Rudolph because Santa made him special, so they were really just sucking up to the boss.

The moral of the story? Reindeer are dicks and Santa will stick up for you if he has a use for you. If I were Rudolph, I’d have led them all up a ditch.